Teaching Girls and Women of All Ages to Avoid The Traps of Low Self-Esteem and Self-Destructive Behavior
by Liz Lewinson
Isn’t it obvious that we – girls and women – should respect and love ourselves? How can we not be drenched in self-respect? Look at everything we have going for ourselves – brains, heart, integrity, courage, initiative, and POWER.
Wait, did I say “power”? Yes, POWER, tons of it. Let me explain.
Women and Power
Many years ago, I heard a talk by a Buddhist teacher. He explained that women are more powerful than men. If you have ever done yoga or had acupuncture, you know there is an energy body that surrounds the physical body. During his talk, I learned that a woman’s energy body conducts life force or kundalini more rapidly than a man’s. Her energy body resembles a butterfly’s wings, extending out far beyond her physical body and vibrating rapidly. A man’s energy body is much more closely held to his physical body, gridlike in structure
I thought about this for a long time. How did a woman’s vaster energy body lead to power? What does power mean anyway? When I looked at the dictionary, I kept seeing terms like “domination” and “control.” I sensed this was the weakest form of power. Then I looked at nature.
Power and Nature
The power of nature is much stronger than any human activity or creation. In nature, power is change, fluidity, and movement. Nature creates hurricanes, earthquakes, tsunamis. The power sources we use today are from change and movement – water rushing through a dam, wind turning the blades of windmills, rays of sunlight interacting with solar panels.
Once I understood power in nature, I got it! The connection between power and females fell into place. We – girls and women – are the power species. We embody power. The change and movement of our energy body is also in our physical body. We menstruate, have greater sexuality, greater stamina, more and longer orgasms, the option for child-bearing, menopause, greater collaboration and communication, higher mental actiivty. This is natural power. It is built in with our female birth.
Why Low Self-Esteem?
So how can we have low self-esteem? The answer is history and habit. It goes way back. About 5,000 years ago, more or less, there was a shift in history. A wave of men, threatened/jealous of the power of women, tried to destroy it in every way – physically, socially, economically, religiously, spiritually. They succeeded. For thousands of years, women were denied education, property ownership, political influence, even high quality food. The notion (Aristotle stated this) that women were inferior to men became baked into society.
This conditioning went on for so long that women began to believe in their weakness as well. Of course this is not happening in every country today, but the residue remains. Women still feel the effects of millennia of repression of their power. Powerless people have low self esteem and self confidence.
Also, all women are receptors for the thoughts and feelings of others. A recent United Nations study (March, 2020) found that 90% of men AND women are biased against women. Think about that for a minute! When you watch TV or listen to music or engage with a video game, or even shop at a department store, you are being bombarded with the energy of people who may have hidden bias against women. It is coming from you. It is being projected toward you.
If you feel less confident after spending time with a co-worker, partner, or colleague, you need to look at that. Are workers, friends, artists you admire projecting a high, positive appreciation of your vast female being that will buoy your self-acceptance, or they carrying a hidden inner distrust and anger toward the innate power of women that will, whether you realize it or not, lower and limit your self esteem?
What I am suggesting is that your lack of self confidence is borrowed. It is not who you are. You may be associating intimately with someone who does not recognize or acknowledge the power of women. You will get drained by this association. The resulting feeling from energy drain is low self confidence, low self esteem. In that range of feelings, you may continue to make poor decisions or draw in angry or additional draining people.
You can break this cycle. Do an energy analysis. Write it down. When do you feel more energy (for example, after exercise, receiving positive feedback on the job, being with certain people)? Notice and write down how you lose energy (for example, being around angry people, getting into stuck routines, watching Netflix all the time).
I think all women and girls after the age of 11 should learn that vast, natural power is their birthright. We should not let anyone take it away by instilling false feelings of inferiority or weakness. All women and girls after the age of 11 should learn to meditate. Meditation build your inner strength and provides a space between you and what others may think. Please know there is not one right way to meditate. Go online and learn five or six ways and practice what feels best.
In this time of global crises, it is time to fix the horrific gender imbalance that was put into place some time ago. Women need to help heal the planet by asserting their natural power level, which is in harmony with the earth. Recognizing the problem – thousands of years of animosity toward the power of women, understanding its roots in total ignorance, will allow you to become confident and use your power.
You Have the Power
You are a born leader who is intuitive, strong, versatile, adaptable. Change, fluidity, and movement is baked into your being. This is critical to understand! If you do not realize this, you can be fooled. Do not rely on the power of others. You have it.
This is the time for women to realize that low self esteem or lack of self confidence is not only hurting them, but the planet. Look around with clear eyes. Identify the doubters and either ignore or avoid them. Meditate. The world needs you now, and even if you are not yet fully confident, you will build your confidence by raising your sails and embracing your voyage.
Extremely powerful women are exactly how it is and should be.
About the Author: Liz Lewinson is the award-winning author of The Power of the Loving Man,” “Women, Meditation, and Power,” and “American Buddhist Rebel: The Story of Rama – Dr. Frederick Lenz.”
Featured image photo credit: Xan Griffin on Unsplash